Adulting :: Friendship

I am 36. As a teenager and a young adult I was not very good at being a friend. I can own that truth now as an adult. I have the best people around me to help me learn.

But as an adult and especially in this phase of life I feel like I have learnt a few things. I have made some of the best friends who I don’t need to be close to physically. I don’t even live in the same city as them but they mean the world to me.

Today could not be any more different to be honest but because we are celebrating Friendship Day it got me thinking about all my friends and what it is to be a friend as an adult.

I have realised that like minded people are very hard to come by as an adult. Especially as someone who has moved every 4 to 5 years. What is even worst is that if some one is not in the same season of life as you they would never understand you.

One of the things that I really try to look for is maturity. I find that a lot of people are still stuck in their young adult mindset and have insecurities because they see some flaw in themselves. I have always found that these very insecurities/flaws are what make them unique. They don’t necessarily agree to that.

The thing that has really helped me is when I put myself out there. I tell me stories and talk about my vulnerabilities. I talk about the issues I am facing and am always looking for honest feedback. I have become so much better with giving compliments because I know that all we want is to be seen. I have grow more and more comfortable in my skin by talking and discussing.

One of the hardest truths however is that some relationships are not meant to last. And that is ok.

So to my college friend , my across the road neighbour and the friend who called us over for our first play date thank you for being you and showing me that adult friendships are still possible.

When was the last time you were able to make a true friend?


  1. I definitely understand where you’re coming from. I used to think that friendship was about having a busy social life- silly me! Since I moved away from my old friends, they completely stopped reaching out to me or trying to maintain any kind of friendship at all. This taught me a great deal about what “relationship” is to begin with, and what it means to be a friend.

    I’m thankful that those old friends stopped talking to me. I wouldn’t have learned otherwise.

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